In it for the Pancakes...
Thank you for visiting my personal fundraising page!
So I’ve struggled with my eating disorder in varying degrees since I was 14 years old. In the famous words of Jennifer Aniston in December 2008’s issue of Vogue discussing the dissolution of her marriage to Brad Pitt, this 19 year fight has truly been “uncool”.
Ok, getting serious….
When I finally decided to seek serious help for my eating disorder I had NO clue where to start. I couldn’t find my voice around it, buried in shame and embarrassment, and didn’t know where to turn, I was desperate. That’s when I turned to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) by calling their helpline. Apart from the much needed resources and counseling they provided me, they told me I was making the "the brave choice” and gave me hope. I have come to learn hope is one of the most precious things you can give someone, a friend or a stranger, and will always be grateful for the gift I received that night from the other end of the phone.
I continue to witness NEDA offering critical awareness, much needed resources, important screening tools and necessary education to scared and confused families, supporters and most importantly those struggling.
When I was hospitalized at the ACUTE Center for Eating Disorders in Denver in 2016, I was showing early signs of organ failure. Something most people don’t know is anorexia nervosa claims 1 in 5 lives and has come perilously close to taking my own a number of times, once given just two months to live without critical intervention. I owe the deepest gratitude to the many Doctors, Nurses and Clinicians who have helped me land on the other side time after time.
When I was in the hospital, my dear Doctor, sat by my bedside and asked ‘Why?”. Not why did I have my eating disorder but why did I want to RECOVER? What was I FIGHTING for? There were so many reasons but I just wrapped it up by saying “Saturday Morning Pancakes”. My doctor kind of laughed but I explained I had pinned this as what I’m recovering TO, nothing complicated, just enjoying a simple stack of blueberry pancakes surrounded by those I love.
Each year, NEDA hosts walks around the country to raise awareness and funds for the important work they do. They are the often the beacon of light for many people lost in their darkness.
My beloved friend Haley, someone I met when I was in residential treatment, wanted to name our small NEDA team "Saturday Morning Pancakes" to honor my simple goal, this metaphor for my recovery.
At NEDA walks around the country many people have T-shirts with bibs reading “I’m walking for_______”. I’ve seen everything from big picture statements like “Recovery” or “Life”, to specific individuals who have sadly lost their lives to their horrible disease. When I think of who I will walk the Brooklyn Bridge for on Sunday, October 7th, I realize I walk to honor my dear friends and family who have been on the front lines, who have been with me in the darkness and loved and cared for me unconditionally along the way. Thank you for being the greatest people one could ever know.
I believe in recovery, I believe it’s possible for anyone struggling for however long to live a beautiful, meaningful life but organizations like NEDA are crucial in this fight.
Please consider making a contribution to NEDA and specifically "Saturday Morning Pancakes". I am asking for your support to help me reach my fundraising goal. Any amount you can contribute will make a difference in the fight against eating disorders. You can also help by forwarding my page to anyone you think might want to support the cause with us!
I think one thing we’ve learned this year and especially this month is that there are SO many people out there trying to recover and survive things they don’t often speak about. I’m trying to find my voice, and if needed, I hope you do too. With that in mind please remember to take care of yourselves and take care of each other….hopefully over a stack of blueberry pancakes.
With immense love and gratitude,
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